Sunday, January 10, 2010
I've learned a lot of things about a lot of people, including myself, over the past year. True colors have been shown and relationships have been severed. My life is very different than it was January 10, 2009. I'm not the same person. I'm still a work in progress but I definitely don't see things the same.
There is one thing that I can say has always been steadfast and true and that is my relationship with my best friend. She has never faltered. I love her like we were carried inside the same womb. My friend has always been there for me and I love her dearly. She is the person I call when I need a shoulder to lean on or a tissue to wipe my tears.
There was a time when my husband and I were both laid off from our jobs. We struggled to make ends meet and keep a roof over our heads. There was no money for hanging out or the extras. My best friend bought me a coat when winter rolled around. That is something that I will never forget. It may not seem like much, but it meant the world to me. She didn't make a big deal about it. She knew what I needed and showed up with it one day. It brings tears to my eyes every time I think of it.
When I found out that my son was going to be a father, she is the first person I called. She has a way of making me feel better about things. She listens. I needed someone to talk to and she was there as usual. It didn't matter that it was really early in the morning and she got home late from work. I felt better about the situation after I hung up that phone. I knew that I needed to take a step back before responding.
I don't know what I would do without her. So many people in my life have turned out not to be what I wanted or needed them to be this year. It's nice to have that constant, that one person you know will have your back no matter what. Every time I realized fake, I called the real.
She has read almost everything i've ever written and has always asked me when I was going to get my sh*t together and start trying to get published. When I finally did and decided to start a book club of people whose opinions I trust, she was the first person I called. All she said was, "It's about damned time."
She always keeps it real with me. That is what I love most about her. It's what I need in my life. I've been told i'm too real, so real that people don't want to ask my opinion. I don't understand that at all. Why ask if you don't want to know the truth? I love that my friend is so honest. I love her even more for it.
We've laughed and cried together and have always been there for each other. She's the only person in this world who knows everything about me. I trust her with my life. I'd take a bullet for her. I remember we were shopping one day and a couple females were getting out of hand with me. They thought I was alone. It was an odd situation. I don't like to fight, but I will. I remember seeing my friend out of the corner of my eye. She was watching and putting on her leather gloves. That's so symbolic of her role in my life.
I don't tell her enough how much I love her and how much she means to me. She won't even see this. She's not really one for computers. It's okay. I was just thinking and needed to make this known. I recently found out that someone I thought I could trust was not who I thought they were. It shook me to my core. Of course I called my friend, Marilyn.
Today I sat down and thought of all the people I had to let go in my heart this year. That lead me to think of the one person I know will always be there. My best friend...