Friday Funny

1. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

2. A day without sunshine is like, night.

3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4. I just got lost in thought. It wasn't familiar territory.

5. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

6. 99% of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.

7. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

8. Honk if you love peace and quiet.

9. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

10. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

11. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

12. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

13. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

14. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

15. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.

16. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

17. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

18. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!

19. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

20. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!

21. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

22. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand...

23. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

24. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

25. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

26. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

27. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

28. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

29. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

30. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

31. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines .

32. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

33. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

34. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

35. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

36. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.

Feeling Nostalgic

For some reason, i've been singing New Edition songs all day long. They are, by far, my favorite male singing group of all time. I love them with Bobby Brown or Johnny Gil. I love BBD and Ralph Tresvant's "Sensitivity." You could not tell me I was not THE Candy Girl. (I still have my album) I know all the choreography for the, "If it isn't Love," video. "Can You Stand the Rain," is one of my favorite slow songs of all time. I have gone to at least five New Edition concerts. I love NE from "Candy Girl," to "Hot Tonight." Their showmanship takes me back to the days when showmanship actually meant something. I heard they're going on tour in 2009, and guess who will be there.

It's been 25 years and New Edition recently received ASCAPS's (American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers) Golden Note Award. This award is given to artists who have achieved extraordinary career milestones. New Edition are the Temptations of my time and I never thought they got the recognition they deserved. Without NE, there would be no New Kids on the Block, no Boyz II Men, no N'Sync, no Backstreet Boys, no boy band craze at all.



I met my husband in 1983 and we had so much fun. The eighties were the bomb. I had a red and black lumber jack, with the hat to match. My husband wore kazals and Sergio Valente's with no lenses. We would go down to Time's Square and see three movies for $3. It was fun to sit in McDonald's all night and talk and laugh.

Rap music was getting it's start and we would go to jams in the park. The deejays didn't always have enough electricity so they would run a bunch of extension cords from someone's apartment. An occasional fight would break out and, once in a blue moon, someone might get shot. It didn't happen that often. We had fun.

The music was fun, not violent. We danced, and flirted, and had fun. It was a different time. Things are so violent and sexual now. Sometimes it doesn't seem like young people know what fun is anymore. They're so busy seeing and doing adult things that they don't have time to be kids.

Guys would walk down the block with their ghetto blasters playing their music as loud as they could. They would even sit them down and have battles to see whose was louder. Just like LL, they couldn't live without their radio.



Remember dookie ropes and Adidas with the thick laces?

When I was young, I played outside all day long. I got upset when I had to go inside. We now live in the day of the video game. Kids don't give a damn about the sun. It's all about Playstation, Wii, and Xbox.

I remember when my father use to tell me the music I listened to sucked or I didn't know anything about music. I would laugh. Now, I find myself saying the same thing to my son when I hear him listening to certain rap songs. I guess I feel that way because I was there at the beginning. I know what it was and sometimes i'm disappointed in what it has become. At the same time, when a rapper tries to say something in his music he probably won't make much money. I guess I just miss the day of the MC, and the deejay at the turntable.



I was just feeling a little nostalgic. You may now return to the twenty first century...

Today's the Last Day

In most states, today is the deadline for voter registration.

My 20 year old nephew stopped by my house the other day and the first thing I asked him was if he was registered. He was extremely happy to tell me he registered a few days prior. I was happy that he was happy. This election has excited so many people. My nephew and I discussed the campaigns and I was impressed with his knowledge. He really knew what was going on and said he made sure his friends registered as well and he would take them to the polls if he had to.

I registered as soon as I turned 18 and encouraged my children to do the same. It felt so good when I received my card in the mail. Voting was a big deal to me. My mother and sister weren't registered and I did what I could to get them involved.

Barack Obama and John McCain (in a different way) have energized people to get out and vote. There's a permanent voter registration table in the lobby of the hospital where I work and I see people signing up every day. People I know who never really cared about politics have become informed and we are constantly having discussions about the campaign. It's wonderful.

There are only a few weeks left and I hope we can do what, in my opinion, needs to be done. We can't afford more of the same. It's time for a change.